JEEZ!!!! i hate it! like, everywhere i turn, i see things that always reminds me of JAJA! JAJA, JAJA, JAJA! nothing else but JAJA... i remember hearing ALL MY LIFE by KC and JOJO this morning..HALUU??? it was that song...that was playing on MY RADIO when we were dancing around the house! JEEZ!!!! and like...BUTTERCUP...he always sings that to me over the phone...



it's so irritating because..this always happens when i try to move on with my life.. i don't know if it's a sign from God that Ja and I are really destined for each other, that i shouldn't try to get over him, but seriously, i feel like i'm going crazy because i can't share this to any of my friends anymore, because they are so fed up with it... and now i just don't know what to do. if i ALWAYS do this..i mean, write, write, write... it would drive me nuts as well, because...ALL I EVER DO IS VENT IT OUT! and when people read it, THEY WON'T CARE! i DO have friends but, they don't act like they are my "friends"... it sucks! like..i'm just this...decoration...nobody cares about how i feel anymore...



i feel so alone..so isolated... i feel so cold...



i've been trying to be happy, but it's even worse...the pain gets...even worse. it's even harder trying to hide how i really feel... i know i've been showing everyone lately that i'm still..u know..normal...but... i guess that's just me...i'm just...trying to hide everything. i don't think any of you would care. you're probably just too busy with your own lives,too...like you would care for someone like me... what am i to you people anyways?

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