I swear, last night ROCKED! :D I dunno...I just felt like it. I mean, I know...I didn't really project well (that I admit...I could've done better...) but...I've just never felt so confident my whole life...I was watching the first batch rehearse and I felt so...nervous and scared. My biggest fear? Criticism. But as I got up on that stage ( the funny thing is before "we" came out, we were like..."SHIT! I FORGOT THE SEQUENCING!... where do we walk first?" yada yada... and then right before Ate Mich said "GO!"...My brain worked. Whew!:D )

I know each candidate was expecting something. But the thing about me is that I did not expect too much. I just hada great time. I enjoyed EVERY moment. Even rehearsing was fun. I loved my "batchmates", they were all nice. I didn't feel like I was competing, I just felt like we were all there to kick ass. :D

John, Shane, Ate Mich and Howard were really nice ta us. And backstage,Ate Shane goes... "ABBIE, NEXT YEAR ULIT!"... haha! I'm like..."HELL YEAH!!!"

My Dad says it's a good exposure...which is true. :D I mean, even if I didn't win, but being there...on's what I love doing....and I'm happy with that. :D

One more thing is the people there with me backstage. Kaye, Upper, George and Leah. And thanks to KAYE who made the NATZ who was my make-up artist... to LEAH and GEORGE who took shots of me on stage... and UPPER...for just being there...and telling me what to do... for cheering... :D

The night couldn't get any better. After the program, George was like,"Abbie, I'm so proud of you!"... I was touched.Even Upper, Leah and Kaye went like... "ANG GALING!!!:D " hehehe...

On the way back to the dorms I saw Baby... :D

And then as I got back to the stall, no matter how weird I looked, no one mocked me! (except for Brian... :D which is a good thing cus my day is never complete without a mock.) and then there's ED. who gave me a hug. and showed me that he - was proud of me,too. seeing those guys there? SHEEZ. I had a perfect day.

In addition to that, we watched the video at the e-house.Then Upper and Camille played jokes on me.... I was laughing like hell that I laid down on the floor. (and i was tired since i ran in my heels. they had plans of locking me out of the dorm... :D)

OTEI! I'm late for class... :) :) :)

Lastly, I wanna thank God because he let me experience all this. :)



AAHHH!!! ... OHWELL... I remember getting this threat from Mommy Odeng..."Abbie, isa ka nalang..."... hhmm...that could mean, Isa nalang may first major offense ka na...or..isa nalang talsik ka na dito!!! .. :S

FUDGE DARN IT! Why the hell can't I get a car and dorm out? OOF! ... it would be easier for me... i think. On my side. WHAT? Curfew is like 9 PM?... UGH, i do love my friends dorming in... can't live not hearing the boys shouting... like EVERY single night like crazy. And of course that includes Mr. Anthony Dulce screaming ABBIE (real loud) to call me over the boy's gate to chat and all that. Haha. Most people think we all should get a life here in Dasma. YEARIGHT.

There's one particular person who studies in Manila, who told me in a very indirect manner that I SHOULD GET A LIFE.

Caloi was right about studying in Cavite. You are a lot more in control of your life. ... Hey, speaking of MR. CARLOS MIGUEL LOCSIN....he was the one who said we should keep in touch...but then I'm like, HELOU? CURLY? and i don't get a reply... hmp!I'm tampo na... :S CALOI! if you ever get to read this...pag nagkita tayo? Let's go get some Ice Monsters and Mojos. Ikaw taya, and you're forgiven. ;p ... lagot ka sakin!!!! HAHAHAHA! :D kita nalang tau G4 or greenbelt sa summer... ;p

anyways... guys...please pray for me! I need yer support on this. Please pray that it's my 2nd...and that I'd do well on FRIDAY. please be there.... 4 P.M. , LAKE PARK... :D :D :D :D :D

OH,, HAPPY MONTHSARY, BABY!!! :D i love you i love you i love you! Let's go bike yellow... :D mumwah!!! :D

that's all.... heheh... God help me.



I dunno. Maybe I'm just paranoid...but I really noticed a close friend of mine started going cold on me. They told me that it's normal...and that friends don't really have to talk to you everyday.I don't know. I have a different feeling about this one. I mean, he's a really good friend of mine. He's one of the people who never left my side when I went through all the shit... And he never got fed up of saying the same thing over and over to me... And then the mocking. It's there everyday. And I have gotten used to it. Like my day is never complete without a single mock. I've been texting him asking if something's wrong, if there was something that I did, but he says there's nothing wrong, and that it doesn't matter. But things still aren't back to normal. What's wrong? What did I do this time? ... The thing about me is that if I get REALLY attached to a certain person it would be SO HARD for me to let go. And this isn't JUST A FRIEND, this is someone I really care for. Someone who showed me how much he cares for his friends. I'm starting to miss him...

Don't take this the wrong way, but...I really do consider him as one of my closest guyfriends, even if it hasn't been a year since we met. and he thinks I don't care.


Anyways, I'm really thankful for Eric,Eyah and George... for asking me to join this... :D SECRET! I'm not sure of it yet so I won't announce it first. :D But if ever I do, please pray for me... :D

Okay, so far i'm doing okay in academics, but I know I can do better... GOD HELP ME.

My Baby and I are doing FINE :D like i said, we're taking things slowly.... which is good. :D I just love that guy... *sigh* *glares*..

Ed, well... I'm trying not to think that "these are the days of our lives"... (y'know what I mean...) but I am still making that...surprise for him. I hope he likes it. Shit, I surely am gonna miss that guy. I don't know how to deal wit things without him. Ed has become my wall, my bestfriend, my big brother... (i know this might sound really exaggerating but it's true...)... I treasure people like Ed. Ugh. these words are not enuf... Ed, man...if you ever get to read this, I LOVE YOU, MAN!.. :'( I don't have anything left ta say...

Jay, thanks man... :D




Darlin I want you to listen,

I stayed up all night

So I could get this thing right.

And I don't think that anything's missin,

'Cause a person like you

made it easy to do.

I've waited for so long...

to sing to you this song.

Cause your eyes are the windows to heaven

your smile could heal a million souls

Your love completes my existence

You're the other half that makes me whole.

You're the only other half that makes me whole.

I think the angels are your brothers

they told you about me

said you're just what she needs.

And I find myself

Thanking your mother

For giving birth to a saint

My spirit flies when I say your name.

If there's one thing that's true

Is that I was born to love you.

You make my dreams

Come true over and

over again

And I honestly, truly believe

You and me are written in the stars

I lived my whole life through

Just given thanks to you...

...lalang...It's my song for Andrew. :D hehe... he's sitting right next to me.

Funny how I used to think I would never feel this way again... and that someone like him came and changed everything. Sure it's not easy giving in. Especially if you've gone through something really traumatizing. But then I'm thankful for that because like what they always say, you've learned from it, right? ... at least I know what to do, and NOT to do... :D and the thing is, everything about and with him is different. I don't say the words that I've said... I don't.... ... ... ohwellz... :D

HI ED! ehehehe.....

mmm....what else... oh, HI ZEE....

Zee blogged about me having NARS. HAH! it's not contagious, don't worry... it's my lipgloss... hehehehe... :D

oh, and...zee...looks like you're the one wit the menstrual flow right now. COO'! Man, what happened ta you? SO QUIET and all... eshadas? ... is that really you, zee?... bring him back!!!! ...

(are we drinking?...)

I'm making Ed something...I'm planning on surprising him... (HI ED! are you surprised now? :D he's sitting right next to between me and Andrew...nice...hehehe...)

... hhhmmm... what else? ...

otei...nothing left to say.... I LOVE ANDREW!!! :D