...Gone ta the MTV Style Awards!!

How stupid of me ta actually miss this event! I just saw Howie this morning, gave me THAT look, and then I just gave out a shrug. Damnit. How could I have not gone?...and then I get ta read Denise's blog ( Denise btw, has one of the coolest blogs ever ).


Next time...err...year, that is... I WILL GO TA THE STYLE AWARDS.



An insight on what's ta come. God willing.

Ever since I was a kid, I always participated in school programs. Probably it was the inner me that was uber-in love wit the limelight.

And I still am.

I have dreams of becoming...Gawd, as nakakahiya as it seems, and most of you might think that I don't have what it takes, I'd really want to become a model. Or an artista , maybe. Who knows?

Yesterday was our first exposure trip ever, ta ABS-CBN where we first watched Good Morning Kris, and it was an incredible experience to see how it all works. And I know being in that industry isn't easy, but when you get there, *whew*.. :D

Let's see...here's a list of the people we all got ta see:

1.) Kris Aquino (LOVE her. She's my third degree couz by the way, but I bet she doesn't know that. :D we're far relatives.)

2.) Mikee Jaworksi ( she looked soooo pretty..)

3.) Archie (from Wazzup Wazzup)

4.) Heart Evangelista ( saw her for the 3rd time...)

5.) Geoff Eigenmann (eeek! :D)

6.) Jolo Revilla

7.) Lookah (her name's Jaja, also from Wazzup Wazzup)

8.) Anime ( they were all in one dressing room..cute. :) )

9.) Pinky Webb

10.) Inno Sotto

11.) JC Parker

12.) Camille Pratts (pretty!!!)

13.) Luke Mejares (who, after I took a shot of him wit my phone, he was like, "Oi! akin nalang fone mo!" and we both laughed.Haha. Cute. Love him. :D )

14.) Jodi Sta. Maria (was intimidated by her...)

15.) Jeffrey Hidalgo

16.) Beth Tamayo

17.) Melissa (from SCQ)

We've only been ta a few studios, but probably one that I won't forget was seeing the set of GAME K N B? Yep, it's coming back. We all saw it before it could be seen on National Television! :D

Sayang lang coz I din't get ta see Drew Arellano, Iya and Lucky.

It was one helluva trip. And it just encouraged me more ta...just fulfill whatever dreams I have in life. Hey, these people made it ta where they are right now. Who were they before they started? Just like us. Though I know they might be richer, but...they're just like us. I bet y'all know what I'm talking about.

Kei...gots ta go.

There's more ta say... :D



It's just so unfair. Things were going well... Of all people why us?

I slept at 11, woke up at 1 A.M. Paputol-putol pa yung tulog ko. The tube was left on, and I woke up ta the final epi of THE BACHELOR. I got the mirror beneath my pillow ( I keep one under 'cause it's been a daily habit of mine ta wake up every morning and see if I have any zits on my face. Vain, I know...), and I couldn't but notice a pair of bulgy eyes. That's what you get for crying for two consecutive hours.

The reason behind the sudden overflow of BAD emotions?

Don't get me started.

I was already pissed that I had lost ("lost") my allowance at home. (How the hell could that happen, right?) I wasn't done picking on what ta eat yet when he opened up this conversation:

Drew: May sumpong si Papa sakin...di kasi ako nag-exam eh...

Me: Huh?

Drew: Yung sa PMA...di ko alam na ganon pala ka-seryoso si Papa dun. Gusto niya akong mag-take, kase...baka mag-retire na siya eh. Nanghihina na daw siya.

Me: *speechless*

Drew: *turns back to the menu*

Me: So...ano...pano...???

Drew: Baka nga matuloy na talaga ako dun, Baby...baka next year daw.

Me: *mood gets even worse*... So, okay lang yun sayo? Kase parang wala lang eh..parang okay lang sai--

Drew: Hindi...*holds my hand* ..hindi okay yun, Baby...kagabi ko pa nga iniisip eh... Tayo.Ikaw. Ikaw yung unang pumasok sa utak ko nung kinausap ako ni Papa...ayoko...di ko kaya.

Me: *turns away*

**drew tries ta cheer me up by tryna close the conversation..there he goes, tryna dodge...but I insisted...***

Drew: Hindi, isipin mo nalang...wala akong sinabi.

Me: Sana diba, ganon lang kadali yun...


Later on I find him wiping his eyes. I bet he got teary eyed. I wasn't sure if he really was crying, though. But it looked like that ta me. I just turned away, I didn't want to think of what could possibly happen. It's like my head was surrounded by this dam that just prevented all these thoughts going in my head.

But I can't help it. What's gonna happen if he pushes through? What's gonna happen ta us?

And then it hit me real bad when I stepped into the dorm. And that's where I started crying. I undressed, wore a towel over my body and sat on the floor, just beside by bed...and then I thought of US.

All those times we spent together. When we acted like a bunch of kids. Those times when we did nothing but cuddle.... And I just couldn't imagine life without him. The future is now blurry. I couldn't imagine him being with someone else...

Shit. This sucks.

Watched "A walk to remember" and half of "Clueless" and "50 first dates" 'til like 5 A.M. I wasn't watching the whole movie though. Most of the time I'd just stare at our picture and cry like hell. Funny, you might think. But you just have no idea what it feels like to be in this kind of situation. I've been here already. I couldn't believe it was happening again.

No. No it's not. This is gonna work. God will help us make this work.

This won't end up like the first. Because I believe this is something different. God help us.

I decided ta lay down 'til I fell asleep. Woke up to my phone's alarm at 7 A.M. I had ta do this reaction paper for Speech. I sat on the bed and took out my Laptop, turned it on and started typing. This was the worst that I felt. I have never felt so down in my life. I mean, I know I feel down whenever we have a fight or something, but this was different.

How are we supposed to enjoy the moments we'd spend together knowing that that day might just come?

I didn't have lunch today. Not that I was tryna make inarte or something, I really didn't have the appetite ta eat.

What am I supposed to do now? How am I supposed to think? Actually, let's rephrase that last question : WHAT am I supposed to think right now? How am I gonna accept all this? Not that it's final but...it could happen.


Tomorrow, most of the COM and JOU students will be going on an exposure trip ta ABS-CBN. I gotta wake up at 5. Goodluck sakin.

There goes starting your week right.



They make these really great super low-rise jeans... you can't blame me if I can't get enough of it! :D

I'll be getting myself a pair tomorrow. :)

3 days ago was MR.CET. Hehe. It was a big day for my Baby. It was a big day for me,too. I had to be his P.A. in which I volunteered to be. No one else had to be. :D It was one heck of a day that I wouldn't forget. One of the "moments" is when he was in his formal attire and he was looking at me,I gave him a flying kiss and he kissed me back! haha. Minus the hands, of course. :D My Baby won Best in Formal Attire and Model's Pick. :) After the pageant I ran ta him backstage and gave him a big hug. :D And of course, it feels good ta actually be there backstage ta dress him up, fix his hair, and we even manage ta give each other a kiss before he goes onstage! :D :D :D It feels good ta pick up after him. hehe. After the pageant, we both decided not ta go back to the dorm since it was 9P.M., we ate dinner at Arroz...his hands were on my waist, and he just kept pulling me closer ta him,and he kept thanking me. That night, he was nothing but extra sweet ta me. He forced ta sit beside me at Arroz even if we both couldn't fit on my side of the table, and he just kept giving me a peck on the cheek. Then he'd just keep saying " alam mo, mahal kita!" over and over...*kilig*... :) And then we crashed at Ed's, before we hit the sack we sat on the parking space and we stargazed. We were looking for our very own constellation. I found one that was sorta like a diamond when you connect them, and when I pointed it out to him I said, "do you know that 'diamonds last forever?' " Then he said, "Talaga? Sige, yan na lang ung constellation natin! :) " ... Aww... Because just like us, we both would want our love ta be like a diamond. Something that lasts forever.

And nothing beats just seeing the person you love next to you first thing in the morning.

...I just finished watching SATC, and one of the many things I just SO love about this show,is it's script, and I am definitely getting all 6 seasons on DVD. I just love how the story turns out, all the twists, and Carrie's quandaries...

and then we switched ta OUT, which had a segment on Cosmopolitan's bachelor bash. Shit, Brent Javier is one HOT...HOT guy. If I was there, I'd melt. No doubt. I could've probably gotten on stage and grabbed him! OOOOFF! ;p

Abbie, behave.

Oh, and before I forget, Baby... BELATED HAPPY MONTHSARY! :D

We all were reminiscing on how things were before we got together... and I remember all of them clearly like they just happened yesterday! All the things we went through, good and bad...

It just really feels good ta have someone like him who didn't easily give up on me. And who won't give up on me. He always told me that we should do whatever it takes...we should do everything we could to make this last.

Mmm...God will help us.

I love you so much, Baby!



It's really funny...and disappointing in a way. I can't believe it. We had our very first fight. After more than 7n months of being together. Haha! .. umm..

I find it funny because it's actually his first time to show me this typa emotion... When he showed me that he was hurt... and that he couldn't sleep or something because of that filthy letter that I gave him that had almost all my sentiments. And I admit I have said some harsh words that I didn't mean. But before he explained me his side, I already gave the letter.

There you have your very first fight.

And for that, I give myself a...Ionno. I'll just hit mah head on the wall.

But really, it felt kinda good in a way, because I do affect my Baby pala.

Baby, I'll make it up to you. I really din't mean any of those.

You know that I love you so much... I LOVE YOU!!!!

And I'm sorry.

*sigh*... This guy... like all of us, he has his imperfections. He is not the perfect boyfriend. Neither am I the perfect girlfriend. But that makes us perfect for each other. He might not live up to my expectations as a boyfriend...but that doesn't mean he doesn't deserve me. I deserve nobody else but this guy. Regardless of the things he can't do. Or the things that I want him to do. I am in no right to change the way he is...and I just feel bad that I treated him this way. Please forgive me, Baby...



The girls love him... girls who don't even know him! How much more do I feel?

Well yeah, I feel so PROUD of him... But yeah it was kinda disappointing wit all those girls...

But then I'm the one he loves! He kept saying it over and over lastnyt...so what am I stressing about? :)

Kei, gots ta go... :D :D :D

Baby, you did kick some ass... :D I love you.

Thanks ta Lance fer staying wit me... :D and lending the stuff...that goes ta Aldrich,too. :D



And you hate me for it.

You know what, you think you can piss me off wit saying such things to me but I am really thankful for people like you. Because you remind me of how lucky I am. And you hate me for that. But I guess I can't blame you. I guess I really am one lucky biatch. You're helping me realize that I am very fortunate for the life that I have. :D I owe that to you...thanks. Please don't stop tagging. :D And don't worry, I won't hesitate being your friend.

Anyways... Baby and I are still...currently...at the moment...presently have been mastering the art of OPEN COMMUNICATION. :D hehe..we both have been so open-minded about things.

TO GO OR NOT TO GO....Darn I really wanna see Tim Yap in the flesh...

Hehe...I know I failed the Compjourn exam... Just done takin it. I'm at JFH208 right now... :D

Well, C'est La vie!! :D

Okay, gots ta go now...

Baby, I love you soooo much! :D And in fairness ta my hubby... he looked really good last night. ionno. :D hehe. I guess that's how it is...when you're crazy in love wit someone you just... aahh.. It's unexplainable. :D



And I love it.

Whew! It's been a LOONG week, I haven't gone home in 3 damn weeks! But it's okay, cause those freakin times I didn't, Baby wus just right in front of me and we'd spend forever talking to each other by his window. :D

We were temporarily insane this one time. :)

Baby and I are actually chatting right now. :D Wow, our first chat ever...kewl! :D

Gosh, I actually thought all those tagboard monsters were burned in hell but they just never seem ta run out of those, eh? hehe. I bet there's more from where they came from, but... Nah. Why should I even start talking about things that don't even matter? And besides, they're the ones who came doing all these rah-rah-I-wanna-kick-your-ass-when-I-see-you-bitch things, right? Like what I've been saying OVER and OVER and OVER... "Geez! I know I'm not doing anything wrong, and if you have anything against me, It's not my problem"...

And if this has something to do about my man...well...eat your heart out, honey. He's all mine... :)

Anyways, about the title... I'm talking about the *kilig* moments... :D Yeah, they just keep coming...

D'ya all know what my Baby gave me for our 7th monthsary? A Hello Kitty parker pen and it has ABBIDREW engraved on it! :D made me melt... :D He gave me a card, too. And it said that he thought of giving me a pen ta encourage me ta study harder...to make me think of OUR future.... :D Isn't that the sweetest thing? :)

Howie's inviting me ta join him ta the MTV STYLE AWARDS! Ohmygawd! Who wants ta miss such a party? But I'll hafta see... make paalam ta my Baby if he lets me. I really wanna go, tho. I mean... it's sorta like... WOW... and I wanna see TIM YAP in the flesh! I'll just keep mah fingerz crossed. :D

So much fer today...

Gots ta roll... :D


Belated Happy Monthsary ta Len and Mark... :)