"Hi Baby. How was work? How did your day go?"

It was like the usual days, when he'd get home from work. But something was different about tonight. He walked up to me without saying a word. He gave me a hug and whispered "I love you so much, Baby"... and hugged me even tighter. I smiled while my eyebrows met. We just stood there, hugging each other for more than a minute. It was nothing grand. But it was one of those moments that I will always remember.


Here I go again.

One of the things I promised myself when I first got into this relationship, was not to think too far ahead. Not to dream too far ahead. But here I am again.

It would be great. I would see him first thing in the morning, prepare his breakfast, cook for him....

We'd have a family of our own. How beautiful our children would look like. This vision of us in the beach. How I would be that happy mother, that happy wife... glaring over her family... giving out a big sigh... thanking God for everything he has given.

Yes. It has gotten that far with me.

Sometimes I thought, even if it doesn't work out now, and he finds someone else... God forbid... all that I pray is that we'd still end up together. We meet a few years later... and we'd end up together.

Kung baga, sa dinami dami rin ng pinag daanan nyang babae, kami parin sa huli.

I'd like that.

I'd like to be the woman he goes home to at night.

Who'd give him wake-up pecks.

Be the mother of his children.

Who'd fix his tie in the morning.

Give him back rubs.

I'd like to be the one who'd be worrying when he isn't home by 11 P.M.

I'd like to be the one he's having a fight with.

I'd like to be the one who gets pissed at him.

I'd like to be the one picking up after him.

I'd like to be his - forever.


I'd love that.

I don't see any problem going through so much shit in life. As long as I still have him. I know, I've said it over and over. But I really do feel that way.

I can't help it. Andrew is just...so perfect to me. I love everything about him. Sure his stubborness ticks me off big time, or when he's really manhid and I'd end up crying because he just couldn't get the message, when he makes me feel like I'm his least priority, but still manages to make up for it, when he's really quiet at dinner, and even if we're together he'd still wear "that face" or feel sleepy, even if that was the only time we spent together in a day, when he looks at other girls, when he ignores me...yeah, ALL THAT. Inspite of those, I still...I still.

I still love him.

And I don't want to stop.

Pray. I should keep doing that. My Mom and Joyce told me to keep praying. Prayers are very strong.

That's how I had Andrew. :)

At most times, when I cry alone, I always keep this vision. Weird as it may sound to you people who aren't very religious, but it have always worked for me.

Since I didn't have anyone to lean on, to cry to, or to hug when I cry, I close my eyes and think of God hugging me. And it just makes me cry more. Because it felt like I was releasing all my pain to him. It's both beautiful and painful for me. And then in a few minutes, I stop crying. I always thought: God tapped my shoulder.


Carlos Miguel "Caloi" Locsin is my childhood friend(who also happens to be Chris Tiu's childhood friend, plays basketball with the likes of Brent Javier, Borgy Manotoc, the Turvey Brothers, A Kagawad at their SK in Urdaneta Village in Makati, a masscomm student at UP Diliman, directed an MTV, been in two Music Videos, featured in Meg Magazine,a heartthrob, and someone that I had a crush on, back in December. hehe. wow, that was a pretty long introduction).

After 6 months since we last saw each other, we finally met up at G4. He was 10 minutes late! Gaah! Well it was partly my fault. We were roaming around Glorietta wondering where ta eat, and it took us like, an hour! Haha! He was like, can I punch you? Can I? Can I?

Like it's my fault we can't decide where ta settle our butts. I really couldn't think of a place ta eat...

But then it was my idea ta eat at CPK, so we both headed for it. Ordered the usual- BBQ Chicken Pizza. :)

And it was his treat - AGAIN! It was my call when it came ta the movie tickets. We were supposed ta watch The Forgotten but then di na daw pwede magpapasok, so we just decided ta watch the advance screening of The Incredibles.

The movie was a definite experience. It felt great sitting in front of very, very annoying children who asked their mothers questions like they were in Timbuktu or something. I'm like, the whole world can hear you!!! Caloi just kept leaning over and whispering : Hey, you okay? You wanna sit somewhere else? And I'm like, No, I'm okay here...

After the movie, we went around and decided ta try Gloria Jeans. My first time. :) Had White Choclit Oreo... It was good enough... :)

And then I was picked up right in front of Tower Records. Gaah. It's gonna be a long time before we see each other again.

I love having conversations with that guy. He's smart kase.

Anyways, thanks Curly. Had a really great time. and I'm still praying.

Okay guys... gotta end this now. Check out Drew's blog! I fixed it, but...just like this though, it's not done yet.

I can't wait ta see him tomorrow. *sigh* Finally.

Honey, Happy Monthsary ta you and Zee. Mwaaaahhh!