It's back to this - TEMPORARILY.

Grr.

I really lost it. You know, the urge to write in my blog knowing that it doesn't look...right...anymore.

haha. whatever that means.

I really LOVE this skin so even if it means I can't have a tagboard with it, I hafta sacrifice. Boohoo.

Anyways...

LUCE - yeah, the graphics aren't working. boohoo. AND, AND, AND you will be disappointed with The Da Vinci Code. I kinda knew it was gonna end up that way. BUT the ending rocks. :-D heehee.

ANNIE - don't worry, my friends are already making me a new one! haha! :-)

JOT - gawan niya nalang ako ng blog kung ganon. haha! :-) Kainis diba, ang dami nilang binago sa movie!

Let's all wait awhile before things can go back to normal around here. Silly template. Grr.

Multiply has been keeping me busy for awhile, that's where I've been writing my silly blog entries and all.
So if I were you get a Multiply account too, and get hooked like ME! haha.

This is how this friggin' blog will look like for the mean time.
It's all but temporary, yo! Haha.

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The movie adaptation of the book always turns out the same.

DISAPPOINTING.

Or maybe because I expected too much.
Maybe because I read it and I know what was gonna happen next?

I actually had an epiphany after the movie, just as they switched the cinema lights on, it dawned on me.

But then after Eliott got the boot from AI, I kinduv forgot.
So I have to watch the movie AGAIN.

Okay so I admit. I liked the movie, but only because it had the visuals. The Louvre, The Saint-Sulpice, the Roslin Church and Silas.

But the story? Hmm.

I loved the ending though. Nothing beats the ending. I kinda reacted to it the same way I did when I read the book.

Man, Dan Brown rocks.

It's 3 AM. Got to hit the sack.
Will post more tomorrow. Or whenever.

Thud.

P.S.
My heroes, Jay and Lance will be working on my new blog. Thank God.

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Tragedy can be beautiful.

Yes it can.

I watched RENT over and over today, as I was packing my stuff up. What I really loved about this movie was how they made you feel exactly how they wanted you to feel. And like I said, it would make you see life in a different light.

Life is beautiful with all its tragedies. These people had AIDS, and through that they found life. This "disease" made them feel more alive. It even made them find love. And the songs...are the only ones playing in my head the entire day.

When Auntie passed, it brought the family together. And even if losing her was painful, she... in ways we did not expect patched everything up - without a word.

Thank you, Auntie. I miss you.

This however, is the opposite of tragic. Two days ago, I transformed into Wonder Woman again, saving a kitten from hunger. It stayed with me at the dorms for the past two days, until I had to leave him again. Poor baby. Good thing the really cool lady guard (who has been genuinely nice to us) took care of little kitty-kat's sibling, and now they're together. I miss him though.

AND...Kudos to my Babe,too. For doing such a good job. Looks like I found my partner when I finally decide to put up that animal orphanage in the future. Andrew likes to put up an actual orphanage for all the street children, and I on the other hand want to put up one for the animals. No, they don't need to be adopted. It would be sort of like...a home for the aged. Just replace that last word with animals, and we're all set. Jeez I could've just said it.

I'm serious about that.

Really.

I'm so SICK of seeing dead animals on the road. I hate to think that people treat them as such because they're ANIMALS.

And just because we don't speak their language, and vice versa, we always connote them being STUPID.
Hold that thought.

They're alive. They can feel whatever emotion WE feel. They just can't say so. But they know anger. They know pain. They know joy.

And if they ever do something we think is stupid, that's because they have their own "nature" of behaving.

If you think that just because we can't understand each other (and blame it mostly on their part because WE dominate this earth) doesn't mean we have the rights to do whatever we want to do with them.

If you ever think, or thought that way... then I guess YOU'RE stupid.

Shame on you.
Jeez.

So...I got back from the dorms a few hours ago, and I was planning on fixing my new blog and Multiply account but I'm just too darn tired. And I miss my Babe so freakin' much.

I wanna hug him again.
Hey Bub, gimme a big kiss. I CANNOT wait to keep you under my pits.
And the fighting. Nothing beats that. Because making up totally rocks.
Aw.

I kinda like it when I get too mushy.
It kinda grosses me out too.

Oh well. That's what love does to you, sugar!

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Here's what I think:

I guess you can say that its been awhile since I last blogged... for the past few days I've had a lot of thoughts my brain cells actually got stuck in traffic. Ergo, listen to what gobbledygook I have under my pits...

Movies, movies and more depressing movies...

I saw Poseidon with my cool Kidlat friends yesterday. Only 6 people survived out the of ten people who were with them from the beggining, what really adds to the disappointment is HOW they died. Especially the first one. Jeez.

And who knew Fergie could act? She looked hot in the movie!

Oh and call me a loser but I just saw V for Vendetta recently and I must say its a superb movie. Although talking about politics (especially in this country) makes me want to take a big nap, because so far that's what a girl of nineteen years of age can only do for now. But this movie actually made politics more interesting. Grool.

Too bad I didn't even get to see Hugo Weaving's face. Except for that time he told Natalie Portman she was free to go. It would probably make want to blurt "Mr. Smith!" in his tone. Haha. I can still imagine him wearing that suit from the Matrix under his vest. Haha.

"VIVA LA VIE BOHEME!" - and then there's RENT, the movie adaptation of the musical (in which Monique Wilson is a part of). I've been a big fan of musicals, and I can say each one I've seen is different, but this one I highly recommend. See AIDS victims in a different light. See how they love life. And if you pay attention, it would actually make you look at life in a different manner. PLUS I love the songs.

"Would you light my candle?..." haha. cool. Rosario Dawson kicked ass.
It makes me want to see the musical. Yes, the actual one you idiot.


There is a Sh*tMotherf*ckerF*ckSh*t situation.

See, I just bought the NBA Live 2006 UMD for my PSP. And even when I play as my man, Lebron James.... I lose over the...can you believe it? The Charlotte Bobcats! Haha. Hey I know, you gotta take it easy on me. Its my first time to play it on the PSP. I must say that I'm pretty good at shooting three points - as a Rookie though.

I cannot imagine how bad I am at this. I bet all my NBA playing friends will be laughing their asses off if they ever knew about this. How can it happen when I'm "pretty" good at playing it? Jeez!

And yes, it is a sh*tmotherf*ckerf*cksh*t situation. Its frustrating, okay?
Grr.


Oh yes, yes, yes! Oui! Si! ME!

I've just realized...aside from wanting to star in an MTV (especially an Up Dharma Down. Kjwan or a Greyhoundz MTV), I've secretly been wanting to be a part of a play or a musical. I guess I've always wanted to be a theatre actress.

Okay I understand that loud chuckle you gave out. But hey, as Nessie would always say...It's free to dream.
Aw, I miss Nessie.

Jeez you can say anything about it but I don't think anything can stop me from doing what I want to do, I know I have God by my side. And God IS and will always be stronger than the devil. As cheesy as it sounds.

But as long as you have God with you, no matter what people say... He is the ONLY one who knows the truth. And through him I can fulfill my dreams.

The rain has poured down again.

I swear, the rain would always make me want to go emo. Everytime it rained I would always snuggle in bed and just wander off.

Take my word for it, but you will think deeper thoughts when it rains. As long as you have your trusty emo song playing in the background.

If I were you I'd do it right now, while you can hear the sound of the rain...and feel its misty air.

Good luck with that!

Lay off the boyfriend!

Whoo. Here I go again (for the NTH time, for crying out loud), sounding like a paranoid,selfish woman protecting her man, tugging him underneath the armpits.

I think I'm so pathetic that I really act mataray around girls who look Andrew in THAT way. I guess you can't blame me, people. First of all, before Andrew and I were together, loads (and believe me, my friends when I say loads) of girls would come up to him and literally a.) ask him out, b.) ask for his name, c.) ask for his number, d.) ask to be his friend in that very instant (girls, we know what we mean when we say " I want to be your friend" to a rather beautiful man. hmm.)
Maybe things were different then, we weren't together. But things haven't changed even after we were together.

Girls would constantly come up to him and do all of the above. Send him messages in Friendster, text him and all. One girl was even like, "Sayang may girlfriend ka na. Can we go out as friends?"

Duh.

Its actually very funny that whenever I diss these girls (because they deserve to be dissed in the first place), they would always come around and say things like...

"You don't deserve him."
"Who do you think you are?"
"Feeling!"
"Mas bagay kami."
"You're not even pretty!"


But that's not the point. Sweetie, do you even see the picture clearly? I'm not fighting for THAT. Besides, regardless of what anyone thinks of me, I'M WITH HIM. So it would be normal for me to act this way, especially when these girls go beyond the line.

Girls can ALWAYS tell when another girl has a hidden agenda or something, especially when it comes to her boyfriend.

I mean, you tell me... HONESTLY. If you were Andrew's girlfriend, and girls do these things to him, wouldn't you do something about it? Especially when its been going on for...forever?

Just while we were having lunch today, a girl who was passing by our table looked at Andrew in this REALLY seductive way, and the thing is I was sitting right next to him!

I'm not being all smug about it, about my Babe, knowing it can happen to anyone in a relationship. It just pisses me off that people have come to have a lot of nerve to do these things. And to think that they would always start it anyway.

Jeez, the things people do to TRY and mess you up.
I won't let it get to me. I'll try not to.

'Cause I don't really care what people say about me anymore, just as long as they leave Andrew out of it. I know Andrew would never pay attention to them, most of the time when we read his Friendster messages together and some girl tries to hook up with him, he'd go like..."Yuck. How cheap."

My Babe has changed a lot. I'm really thankful for that. He's showed me in so many ways how happy and satisfied he is with me.

Its just funny though, we actually "debate" about...almost anything. We have so many differences but...we just can't get enough of each other. Even if we have petty fights most of the time.

And I'm damn sure that this blog entry wouldn't change anything. I just want all y'all to know that I don't give a crap what you say about me. Because I was never the issue anyway.

It's YOU.

You're the one who's always had a problem with me. I could sit on my ass and you'd still say something about that.
"OMG look at how she sits!"

Haha. Hilarious.

So when it comes to Andrew, I'll put it in words that YOU can understand, and here it goes:

Sa iba mo nalang ipakamot ang kati mo.

I'm sure that a lot of guys would come after you. From the school's main gate, you can cross the street, roam the eskinitas and I bet, someone so macanto would fall for you. Good luck. Tell me how it goes.

You know what?

In the end it all comes down to respect. If you want people to respect you, respect them.
If you want people to take you seriously, shut the F up.
God didn't give you a mouth for THAT.
Life is short, and so beautiful.

And please, stop acting like you're perfect.
Hmm.
May God bless you.
May He bless you all.

And yes, the curtain call.

There will be minor changes with my blog in about a week's time. So excited. I might change the link too. Little Miss Gold Digger sounds so sappy. LOL.
Yes, its for that reason and nothing else.

I'll let all my friends know.

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Your mission, should you choose to accept it...

...is to KISS MY A**.

Or not. Okay, maybe I forgot to mention this ta all y'all that I have been ( and will always be ) a Mission Impossible fan.

I just saw MI:3 last week and I must say, NOTHING beats MI:2. I've watched that darn film over a hundred times! More than Pearl Harbor, I believe.

I have felt more passion for Nyah and Ethan... than Jules and Ethan.

Hmm.

So anyway, cutting to the chase (because all MI films are full of it...LOL)...

I saw a Paris Hilton journal at Powerbooks but then I decided to get the Kama Sutra Journal.

Surprisingly, it WAS NOT full of...you know what, but the journal was more about souls and bodies. It was cool, though. So I bought it. I was desperate to get a journal. Not all my thoughts can be shared with the world, you know. LOL.

So there.
I'm in Alabang right now. I can't wait to have dinner.
Hmm.

...This message will self destruct in 5 seconds.

Thud.

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Preview Overload!

I swear, this magazine will be the reason of me ending up broke.
And to think that tomorrow I am scheduled for another full hour and a half of thrift shopping.

Yes, Friday is Ukay day. Its official.

So, I just grabbed my copy of the May issue last night, and I might say...so far, this is...the best issue EVER.

I loved the every page of the magazine. PLUS they featured SKINNY JEANS and WAISTED BELTS, and sweetie CHINGGAY, in which I should just mention looks SO hot!


She's leaving for the states today ( or left? ). Aw, you have a safe trip Chinggay, I'm going to miss you more! Boohoo.

You should see my friendster account, I will be showing off my addiction for Preview. Haha.

Oh well.

OMG you've seen "Just Friends", right? I so love that song, "EYES"..

"Missed the last train home...Birds pass by to tell me that I'm not alone...Cause I'm losing myself...It's in your eyes, open your eyes...."

Heehee.

Hmm. Now I'm out of words.

Not much gobbledygook to share with all y'all.

Except that.... SUMMER? BUMMER!

Ick, could I be any more cheesy? Gah.

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Some questions, some answers, someday.

But before that...
I don't know if its that or its just the effect of one afternoon talk full of horror flicks.

The Amytiville Horror. The Exorcism of Emily Rose. Silent Hill. The Omen.

I get so paranoid sometimes its driving me nuts.

Then recently I've been thinking about all the questions on Religion.

The Da Vinci Code. The Jesus Papers. The Gospel of Juddhas.

All these unraised issues about God, and how Jesus lived his life on earth.

When I read the book, my faith wasn't shaken, but my belief on the teachings of the church. And its too much of a sensitive topic to tackle. It can offend many people, I might say.

I have never, once in my life questioned the existence of God.

People around me have somehow put the idea into my head, that there are many possibilities that John Lennon's idea of God merely being a creation of humans, that God is simply a measurement of our pain. I'm not saying that they're wrong, or what they believe is wrong. They have the rights to believe what they want to believe. But I will always have my faith.

Sometimes though, I think about it and tell myself that maybe I'm just scared that if I start questioning, I will punished, and that karma will easily find its way to me.
Then I thought that I couldn't just let that go. The idea of God watching me, the idea of God being...God.

The fact that we question, well it will always be there. We're humans. God made us that way.

God.

To question God's existence (in my opinion), is a SIN.
Its the biggest sin you can commit.

My muslim friends would always tell me that you sin even when you "think" about committing a sin.
And to think that God does not exist?
Just saying that gives me goosebumps.

What I'm really curious about, is how Jesus existed on earth. How he lived his life. What he really looked like.

What's the first thing on Jesus' mind when he wakes up? What was his favorite food? Who was his favorite disciple? What was his favorite animal?

You all know that Andrew (my Andrew) was a seminarian. So I'd always ask Mr. Self-Righteous about things I'm most curious about when it comes to Religion.

"Beb, wala kayang tinatago yung simbahan? Lahat kaya ng nakasulat sa Bible accurate? Ganon kaya talaga yung mga nangyari?"

Did the church leave anything out? Why didn't they publish all the gospels of the other disciples, or whoever wrote about God in his time? Is it because they thought they would only include the ones that seem to be true, what they only want the people to know, or that the bible would've been too bulky? Are there other things written that contradicts their teaching?

And then I wonder...what the church teaches us every Sunday (or even everyday) at Church, is this really what God wants us to know, or is there more?
Will God be mad at me for asking these questions?

Eversince I got to Jeddah, I would find myself talking to God like he's my friend or something. It was hard to practice Christianity in a Muslim country.
I would talk to him like I would talk to my Mum. Tell him stories, beg him for something like I was begging for candy. I would still do that today, every Sunday or everytime I feel like gravity is pulling me towards the Church.

"Hello, God. I feel like talking today. I need to tell you something.... and can I please...."

Yes, it goes that way.

Priests would preach the word of God, and say their Homily like they were still reading it from the Bible. If you really listen to them, you'd realize that some of them don't even make sense.

Sometimes its best to just pray or read the Bible. Sometimes you can feel God's presence when you're alone.

Wait, I'm contradicting myself.

So maybe we're not sure if the Bible states exactly everything that happened when God was on earth. But the Bible still tells us about God.
There are TONS of books. Tons of documentaries. Researches on Religion.

You may not be the type who would go to Church every Sunday, or pray the Angelus at 6:00 P.M., or pray the Rosary with your family (I miss doing that).
I also wish people in Hollywood would stop producing films that doesn't show any trace of God or God's power, or the simple trurth that good people will always win over the bad people. And when films touch certain issues like angels and demons, but show that God didn't even "try" to help, or win.

In hard times like these,
I say question anything about that except God's existence.

We may not have answers today. But we will. If we believe in God. I'm so sure that HE is the ONLY one who can answer our questions. Whatever our questions are. That's one of the many rewards we get for believing. For accepting.

Imagine sitting on a cloud, with hundreds of angels, a few playing harps, and God seated near you, where you can ask him anything that pops into your head, without ever having to excuse yourself to go use the bathroom, or drink water because you're thirsty. Because you will never feel that when you're there.

Imagine just being surrounded by his greatness.

Question everything else. But believe in God.
I know I will no matter what. I think you should too.
Have faith. Not 'cause you have to. Or you're left with no other choice, because you know in your heart that its true. That its really there. That HE is really there.
Because we both know...that it is the only thing that will save us.

From all of this.

2 comments:

Its out, its out!

Wah! Get your copy, I may not be the cover, but its my first fashion spread and I'm so damn proud of it! I love the photos, and the lay-out and all.
It has Lindsay Lohan on the cover. Hah! :-)

Saab's article is there, Camille is there too! So get your copy!!!

Plus no matter how much I hate my "left" angle, it kinda looked good. At least for me it does.

Thanks again to Tata Mapa, Mia Fausto and Cindy Go! The Seventeen crew! You guys are the best!
And Sara... I love Sara! Heehee.

So there.

I loved how Saab wrote her article, so real. And Camille looks so damn hot!

So there. Again.

Lol. O, go na! Drag your ass out of that chair!

3 comments: