361 down, 4 to go.

2009. How do I even begin to describe 2009? 2009 was flawless? 2009's favorite movie is Varsity Blues? ... Okay, srsly. 2009 punched me in the face. It wasn't awesome.

2009 was Switzerland for me. It was both good and bad. I think this was the year where I could say I've 'grown up'. But who am I kidding. I will always be 17 no matter what. Hurhur. Though I am not in a reflective mood, I'll try my best to sum up my 2009 - just not in the same way as before.

I think this was a year of struggle. There were so many things to deal with - emotionally and mentally, family, love life and work-related. It didn't really feel like I went through 2009 at all. It was like I was in limbo. Like I decided to function on auto-pilot mode, never really realizing what's here, the blessings I've received.

I was struggling to be strong for my Mom, and to what our family had to go through. Never in my life did I imagine my Mom to have this. Truth be told, reality hasn't set in, all I do is keep positive, because that's the only way I can stay sane. Optimism and Realism don't really go together most of the time.
I was struggling in my relationship. There came a point in time where I felt neglected, when I barely had one hand holding on. It wasn't easy at all. I was back in the days where I would cry in the bathroom like I had two years ago, when I was surrounded with vivid nightmares.
I was struggling with work. When things just keep getting out of hand and I start to question my purpose, or deeply think about what I really wanted to do in life.

But then...

Looking at the bright side, there are so many things to be thankful for. My Mom surviving, as she will for many many many years, Andrew flying to the Middle East, my engagement, my awesome co-workers... they're what make my year 80% better.

In 4 days, the sun will set for 2009. After that, we'll huddle around family and friends, celebrate as the year officially ends, and we'll pray for a better tomorrow. For a better 2010.

We'll pray for better lives for each member in our family, we'll pray that justice will be brought to the victims of the Ampatuan Massacre and all the heinous crimes and tragedies of 2009, we'll pray for a better future for the Philippines, for the OFWs and the less fortunate, we'll pray for forgiveness, we'll pray for stronger faith.

Peace, Love and Happiness, everyone! God bless you all!


  1. God bless Abbie! I wish you all the luck and love. <3

  2. I wish the same for you, gorgeous!!! Thank you so much! <3