Your life, Your Truth.


When you're trying to defeat a devil, the battle isn't very easy to win. But if you remain on your best, and stay as calm as you can, with God on your side? The battle may not be easy, but you'll surely win it.

I don't even know how I can begin to explain this. If I be too honest, the truth could be used against me - but its the only way to be able to explain my side of the story.

She told a common friend that she wants to be my friends with me and that she doesn't want to be in any sort of "trouble", and that she wishes to sit down with me and Drew one day to explain her side, and that she only did it because he initiated.

It was kind of hard for me to believe because in the first place, after I confronted her about everything I found out, she ended up cussing me and calling me and Drew liars after he fessed up and admitted everything to me. She said stuff like he was making up stories of what really happened, that he was running after her. It ruined me so much, I thought I wasn't going to survive any of it, and whatever was coming my way.

Believing Andrew's side of the story, some people call me biased. Like, "Of course you'd believe him. But what if she's telling the truth?" ... Thinking about the possibilities can drive me nuts. But here's the thing : Apart from God really knowing the truth, ONLY YOU CAN SAY WHO YOU SHOULD BELIEVE IN. I'm not fooling myself, God knows. I believe Drew because he may have lied to me but he's not being dishonest this time, about anything. He's always admitted his faults. He's always said I can't just blame the other person without blaming him, because he made a mistake too. Which is totally the opposite of what she's doing. And yet she says she 'understands' why I'm so mad after what she did.

I can't believe how much of her friends and some of my friends she manipulates with all the twists and lies she does. It bothers me so much that to them, Andrew is the bad guy. He made a mistake, but he certainly isn't the person she's trying to tell everyone he is. I can't change how people see him, I know that. I don't control the way they think - but I love Andrew, so much. And I don't want people thinking of him that way. But he doesn't care. He always tells me he knows the truth anyway, and the rest are just outsiders. Besides, he knows his mistake. He can't change that, and he's gotten over it, so why fight to clear his name?

I wonder if I'm ever going to get over her. I'm kinda sick of it, but I'm also kind of obsessed with getting back at her. But I have to remember that this is not my battle, but God's. I just don't know how I can make any of you understand the pain I still feel whenever I think about her.
But I shouldn't. Life is too beautiful to be wasted on people like her.

When will my own words ever sink in to my puny brain?


5 comments:

  1. They say time will heal the pain. I say time will make you forget what happened.. well not really forget, but someday it will no longer be a big part of your worries. Someday you'll say: "oh whatever".. someday you'll just laugh about it..
    I've been through the same situation eh. But now I dont worry about it anymore. I still remember what happened but I no longer worry about it, it doesn't bother me anymore.
    As time passed I learned to move on, and I know you'll do as well.

    Oh by the way.. the firl wanted to be friends with me as well, we tried to.. but it didn't last for more than a week or something..
    And now I realize that it's really a bad idea. The best thing to do is to take distance from each other, there's no reason to be friends, it will just complicate things even more :)

    Oh btw, I've been visiting your tumblr before :P
    Just felt like saying something now coz I can relate ..

    Take care!

    Jas

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi Jas, thank you for leaving a comment, I really appreciate what you said, and for sharing your experiences with me as well.

    I don't think I'd ever be friends with her, I don't want to be. Bless your heart for being THAT nice to even consider it, but me? I just couldn't. I went through a phase where I thought I wanted to, but...no.

    Thanks for giving me hope that this will no longer bother me one day. Its been 2 years since it happened, but really...who can easily forget something like that. There is hope for me after all! Heehee <3

    God bless you! :) I hope this isn't the last time I hear from you, Jas :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. believe it or not, but we became "friends" right after I found out, I was so naiv! She was really doing it to get him back, and I was doing it.. well to find out what really happened. But how can u trust the person who tried to steal your boyfriend.

    It took a long time before I could trust my boyfriend again. I didn't really tell people(my friends) about what happened, I think only one of my friends knew it so I didn't really have a problem with people doubting my boyfriend like you.. But hey who cares what people say, you know him better than them. And at the end of the day, you're the one who's going to be with him not them :)

    And yeah you said it happened 2 years ago? well mine happened 4-5 years ago.. Of course I don't really forget but the feeling of "hatred" started to fade last year.
    Now I just see it as a lesson, it made me a stronger person :)

    You and your boyfriend look cute together.. Stay inlove :) God bless you too :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Goodness, that sucks! But now that you mentioned it, I'd be glad to know if she tried and failed. Cos mine tried and was successful in a way (if you know what I mean). It's really complicated, actually.

    The trust issues, that will always be there. I mean, yes we love them and we want to trust them again, and we will - it just takes time. And thanks for saying that, I really shouldn't care what they think :)

    I look forward to the day when the hatred fades as well. I'm glad that we're the victims too, it just proves how much better we are than them. Haha! :)

    Thank you, bless your sweet heart <3

    ReplyDelete
  5. Well she tried. Sinisiraan niya si bf saakin para ako mismo ang makipag break. But of course I found out, f.eks. she told me they were together, but he was home and I was talking to him by that time lol.

    ReplyDelete