Because


EXPECTATION

"Hi."

"Hey"

"What's up? How are you?"

"Fine. You?"

"Good."

"Good to know."

"How's everything?"

"Don't."

"What?"

"Don't act like you care."

"I don't understand."

"You see, you always do this. You ignore me for months, and then you talk to me like nothing happened. You ask me how I'm doing, and then you listen to me, and then I believe you, and then I trust you. And then you leave me."

"Sorry."

"Please...I'm begging you, please. Please stop it. Please stop pretending like you care, please stop making me love you even more, you don't know...how hard it is to keep my distance. You don't know how fucking hard it is not to talk to you when I knew you were sad, when I knew you were sick, when I knew you were going through things, and I wanted to be there for you. YOU DON'T KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO TELL MYSELF I HAD TO BE STRONG. That I had to stay away because its what you fucking wanted."

"I didn't say that I wanted you to stay away."

"YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING. And I was stuck here asking myself what I was supposed to do. I send you a message and all you replied was this "<3" WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? I called you, and you rejected it. You never even explained why. So please, you have killed me enough. You've done this to me so many times and all I ever do is let you in, all I ever do is trust you, is believe you, and all you ever do is let me down. YES, I KNOW MY PLACE. YES, I KNOW YOU CAN'T BE WITH ME. But I have feelings too. WHY DO YOU ALWAYS THINK ITS OK FOR YOU TO HURT ME? WHY DO YOU ALWAYS THINK ITS OK FOR YOU TO KEEP YOUR DISTANCE WHENEVER YOU WANT, JUST COS WE'RE NOT TOGETHER? BUT I TOLD YOU I LOVED YOU! YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME TOO! SO WHAT ARE YOU DOING? IF YOU WANT ME OUT OF YOUR LIFE, BE LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE AND TELL ME YOU WANT ME OUT OF YOUR LIFE! ITS NOT THE FIRST TIME SOMEONE'S EVER LEFT ME. SO BE LIKE THEM! FEEL FREE TO BE LIKE THEM! PLEASE! I'm begging you. Please. I still love you. And I will never stop loving you. But I don't know if I can still take you treating me like shit and all you'll ever say is you're not perfect. I wasn't asking you to be perfect. All I'm asking is that you don't make hurting me an option. YOU DIDN'T EVEN GIVE ME A RIGHT TO HAVE A PLACE IN YOUR LIFE! Please...I love you. Please tell me to stop." 



REALITY


"Hi."

"Hey"

"What's up? How are you?"

"Fine. You?"

"Good."

"Good to know."

"How's everything?"

"I miss you. I miss you so much. I miss you terribly."

"I miss you too. Miss you more."
 

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